We all get confused sometimes. One of the biggest confusions can be knowing what we really want from life. We can know what others may want us to want. We can think we know what is best to want. We can rationalize a life path and draw it up. But sometimes, we can feel a longing or disappointment about where we are in life. Maybe our true passions have changed. Maybe we have been lying to ourselves about what we want. But, as the saying goes, "The heart wants what the heart wants…" … and that is all there is to it.
Many people spend the best years of their lives watching television, playing games and often working at a job they have little passion for or even dislike. They work at what does not make them happy to afford more TV, more games and maybe fancy toys. An author once described much of humanity by saying, "Most people die at twenty and are buried at eighty". One might say that many people really are zombies. Your real job is not to be one of them.
What do you really want in life?
Answering this question at any given time is the real challenge in life. When asked what they want or what their goals in life are, most people can blurt out this or that answer, but often it is only true in a very shallow way (or not even true at all). Knowing completely what you want is life is a difficult question. And most us prefer not to deal with difficulties … we have enough of them without looking for more. Others way over-think the issue. They wonder and worry so much about what they want that they fail to see this is just another way of avoiding the answer.
To discover what you want in life, try looking deep into your heart. Looking to your mind about what you want can often breed confusion and here is why: What you know in your mind is only what you know of the past. If you are unsure about what you really want in life, how can the answer be found there? Unless at some time in your life you really did what you really wanted to do. And, somehow you lost it. Oftentimes, people are ruled by logic. People live by what they think they should be or by what others like them to be. To answer the question, ‘what do you want from life’ is actually a discovery process. It is an adventure. Your mind can help with that discovery, but it is important to know that your heart desires comes from the whispers of your authentic self.
By authentic self I mean the real you. As wise men have been saying for centuries, the wisest man or woman is on who knows themselves. To answer that question about what you want in life, and to know the answer, is all about know who you are. And that is no easy task. An excellent place to start is not what you think you know about yourself, but instead to kept the mind quiet so you can hear what your heart is saying. This is not to say the heart is ALWAYS right. Which is why you do need to keep your head in the game. What I am suggesting to you is that very, very often the heart is authentic about it’s desires. What your heart desires is what you usually love to do and this represents your passion. Anything done with passion is like play where the task is accomplished without undo effort or regrets. You pour out your very best and feel no pressure or resistance.
You will totally enjoy doing things that are your passion. Setbacks, difficulties, and obstacles will make it more challenging, but should not deter you from pursuing your goals. Naturally, there may be barriers that may prevent you from reaching your goal, but your heart’s desire will find ways to overcome these barriers so that you may ultimately get what you want in life. Remember this: The universe supports people who are pursuing their passion and those who are pursuing their destiny.
The poet Rumi said, “Live completely in the head and you cannot feel the breath and rhythm of life. Live completely in the heart and you may find yourself acting like a love-struck fool with poor judgment and discipline. It’s all a fine balance – the head and heart must forge a lifetime partnership if one wants to live a beautiful life.”
Listening to your heart is a lot like listening to your instincts. There seems little in denying that one’s intuition, instincts and heart are all part of human nature. And they are the most mysterious part of human nature. Your authentic self communicates with you and guides you via these mysterious human faculties. Where the mind is loud, our heart felt instincts are very quiet and only gently nudge us towards a certain path. Your role then is to listen to them, but this requires some work.
Too often we listen to what others say and allow them to run our lives. Parents often do this to their children, which is only what parents can do to help a child develop. “We come from a family of doctors, so my son must also be a doctor.” How often do we hear this from parents who have good intentions for their children? Unfortunately, sometimes parents unconsciously block the true expression of their child’s real self and calling. Friends and critics will discourage you and point out the impossibility of your dream. Why does this all happen? Because NONE of them can hear your heart. Only you can.
So here is a suggestion: Make sure at least once a week, every day if you can, take a little time to sit quietly and listen. Watch a sunset or sunrise. Go for a walk by yourself (dogs are allowed since they rarely have an agenda about who you should be). With a little practice you will begin to sense what your life is about and who you really are. From there it is not far to knowing what you really want in life. Once you know what you want, engage the mind to create a plan to achieve it. One more thing: Never stop asking the question about what you want. Things change. People change. And sometimes we need to adapt our direction in life to accommodate those new wants and needs.
Now, go be a bright light in the world and enjoy yourself. It is perfectly O.K. to do so.
Should you want a little help in getting what you want out of life, investigate Amazing Self
