Plot
A family vacationing in a small town discovers the entire town is inhabited by goblins in disguise as humans, who plan to eat them.

Release Year: 1990

Rating: 2.3/10 (15,047 voted)

Director: Claudio Fragasso

Stars: Michael Stephenson, George Hardy, Margo Prey

Storyline
A young child is terrified to discover that a planned family trip is to be haunted by vile plant-eating monsters out of his worst nightmare. His attempt to save his beloved family is assisted by the spectre of his deceased grandfather. Also, there are NO trolls in this movie, only goblins.

Writers: Rossella Drudi, Claudio Fragasso

Cast:
Michael Stephenson - Joshua Waits
George Hardy - Michael Waits
Margo Prey - Diana Waits
Connie Young - Holly Waits (as Connie McFarland)
Robert Ormsby - Grandpa Seth
Deborah Reed - Creedence Leonore Gielgud
Jason Wright - Elliott Cooper
Darren Ewing - Arnold
Jason Steadman - Drew
David McConnell - Brent
Gary Carlson - Sheriff Gene Freak
Mike Hamill - Bells
Don Packard - Drugstore Owner
Christina Reynolds - Cindy
Glenn Gerner - Peter

Taglines: The original boogeyman is back

Release Date: 12 October 1990

Filming Locations: 1680 East Center Court, Heber City, Utah, USA

Technical Specs

Runtime: 95 min

Trivia:
Rossella Drudi, The Director's wife and co-writer of the film, got the idea to write the movie after several of her friends became vegetarians at the same time - this is why the Goblins in the film are vegetarians.

Goofs:
Crew or equipment visible: When Drew is leaving the store after buying milk, there is a close-up shot of a man wearing sun glasses. If you look carefully you can see the reflection of the camera man standing on the street.

Quotes:
Diana: Michael! Who are the goblins?
Michael: The goblins?
[giggles]

The Holy Grail of bad movies

Rating: 1/10

This is it, folks -- the worst movie ever made.

I know, I know, there are many who argue that "Plan 9 from Outer Space" and "Manos: The Hands of Fate" are worse "films" than this one. Well, I'd advise those people to give "Troll 2" another viewing, this time with an open mind. As something of a self-made authority on the worst of the worst in modern cinematic torture, I feel qualified to make the bold assertion that "Troll 2" is the cream of that particular crop.

From its laugh-inducing "soundtrack" (apparently recorded using only a vintage 1980s Casio keyboard) to its unilaterally awful acting, "Troll 2" is a life-changing experience, similar to the Middle Ages' trials by fire. If you succeed at ingesting this festering piece of cinematic detritus in one sitting, you will emerge a new person, like a phoenix rising from its own ashes. The watching itself may be painful, but it is ultimately worth the pain to be able to say, with conviction, "I survived 'Troll 2,' and I'm still technically alive."

The special effects in this movie are, indeed, special -- like a one-legged blind woman with Alzheimer's. Trivia: one of the various Emmanuelles from the infamous "Emmanuelle" series of soft-core porno movies designed this movie's pitiful costumes. That should give you some indication of their quality.

The acting -- my God, where do I start? Suffice it to say that, if you set any cast member on fire, I would lay down even money that he or she would have a hard time convincing onlookers that it hurt. They're really that bad. More trivia: One of Elliot's "boys" in this movie would later go on to reprise his role (Disposable Character in Bad Movie) in the Lou Diamond Phillips classic "Bats." Even more trivia: The father in this movie was a local dentist, and most of the extras were bona fide Utah residents, as well. Talk about low-budget.

Back to the soundtrack -- There's not a single scene in the movie where the music is appropriate to the on-screen action. I get the impression that the "composer" employed for this stinker was, in fact, a failed auditioner for Def Leppard's still-vacant keytarist position. Seriously, it's rare, even in straight-to-video dogs like this one, to hear music of this woeful caliber.

What more can I say that hasn't already been set forth in previous reviews? This is the worst movie I have ever seen, and that's saying something. It's physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausting to watch this film -- I recommend doing it alone, at least the first time you see it...that way, you can concentrate on its truly majestic badness -- and on feeling your brain cells die off, one by one, until you are no longer able to speak.

Good luck to you, if you decide to watch this one. It doesn't get any worse than "Troll 2."

ADDENDUM (October 2007): This is still the worst movie of all time. Its status as such will never change. "Troll 2" is simply the perfect storm of bad writing, casting, direction, cinematography, costuming, score, makeup, effects, acting, editing, and inspiration.

UPDATE (June 2010): I just watched it again. Alone. In one sitting. God help me, some component of my brain must be fundamentally defective.

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